BLACK PEOPLE, BLACK PEOPLE…DO YOU NEED A JOB???
The Department of Justice is seeking to hire linguists fluent in Ebonics to help monitor, translate, and transcribe the secretly recorded conversations of subjects of narcotics investigations, according to federal records. On the surface, I laugh, but inside I cry. Is the Department of Justice is really serious? Yes. The Drug Enforcement Administration is looking for nine linguists to fill positions in their Atlanta based office. In the RFP (request for proposal) Ebonics is listened as a common language spoken in the United States. Oh you don’t believe me? Check out this website: http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/bizarre/justice-department-seeks-ebonics-experts. Still looking for evidence, check the below document:

According to Dr. John R. Rickford, a Stanford University professor of linguistics, Ebonics is described as “Black English” and said that, “Ebonics pronunciation includes features like the omission of the final consonant in words like ‘past’ (pas’ ) and ‘hand’ (han’), the pronunciation of the th in ‘bath’ as t (bat) or f (baf), and the pronunciation of the vowel in words like ‘my’ and ‘ride’ as a long ah (mah, rahd)” http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/bizarre/justice-department-seeks-ebonics-experts. Interested in learning more about the opinions and/or research of Dr. Rickford on the topic of Ebonics? Visit his university webpage: http://www.stanford.edu/~rickford/ebonics/.
So, the Federal Government cannot understand the slang and wants us to teach them that bad means good and good means wack? This is absolutely hilarious to me. I think of the movie with Charlie Sheen and Chris Tucker when Chris introduces the slang term “phat” to Charlie. I think of all those TV shows back in the 70’s when the there is a White person saying to a Black person, “I’m down.” The best representation of what I believe that the DEA is looking for is in the movie ATL. There is a part where everyone is at the skating ring. T.I.’s little brother, played by Diana Ross’s son, Evan Ross, is in a car with some older cat and the older guy is attempting to solicit the purple; the haze; the “oooh weee” (that’s that good weed) – sidebar, this is what the DEA is looking for, a translator; hell I might apply. Anyway, this cat is talking and you cannot understand what in the world this dude is saying. And his from the Dirty Dirty (that is the Southern United States for all you who are not fluent in Ebonics), so you know he can’t talk. It’s so bad that there are subtitles at the bottom of the screen to translate what this Negro is saying. Indeed that was a WTF moment. Wait for the 50 second mark. Here is the clip below:

Now, here is what pisses me off with this whole thing; did anyone watch the Wire, anyone at all? Okay if not, the show was about the drug game in Baltimore from the viewpoint of the dealers, the kids, the police, the politicians and the media. The show was masterful; in my opinion, HBO’s best drama – better than the Sopranos, Sex in the City, Big Love and even better than True Blood. Anyway, the show actually showed conversations between dealers on various levels. It also showed conversations between politicians and drug dealers. Stringer Bell, played by Idris Elba, was academically and intellectually smart and he was one of the biggest dealers on the show, along with partner Avon Barksdale, played by Wood Harris. He never used Ebonics; never. Stringer may have cursed, used a slang word here and there, but Ebonics? What the hell is Ebonics? They spoke English.
How come when a Black person adds their own flavor or a “twang” to words and such, it becomes Ebonics, but when a White person adds some damn “twang” to words, it’s a regional accent or dialect? I can barely understand James Carville half the damn time and people love his “regional accent.” However, if a Black guy from Louisiana uses that same dialect, he sounds like a slave and it’s called Ebonics? I don’t understand that. It makes no sense to me. Who made this directive to hire Ebonics translators? Does President Obama know about this? Did he sign off on this? Somebody get Shaft on the case. Here is what the Justice Department needs to do; they need to hire people to translate Spanish, Arabic and political bullshit because the last time I checked, Cocaine and Heroin isn’t grown in the Ghetto and it damn sure isn’t transported to it by a dude wearing a thermal shirt, sweatpants and Timberlands driving an Escalade.
© ClarkMiller Publishing

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